Hi friends…

When thinking about boundaries, it’s important to know the difference between people pleasing and God pleasing.

I hope this will help you.

If you have any questions or thoughts in response, feel free to comment and/or contact me.

If you would like to talk with me about having healthier boundaries in your life, you can schedule a call by clicking here and booking an appointment. I look forward to talking with you!





  1. brianbalke says:

    This is so wonderful. Thank-you! I hope that you realize that this is the true meaning of the parable of the talents. Jesus did not give his disciples money, or skill or comfort; he gave them purpose, courage and faith. I pray that you will be surrounded by those that recognize the light you shine.

    You worked around this issue, but I thought I’d explore it more explicitly. As you said, strength comes from abiding in the love that originates from God. It comes from within. But in so much of our society, we can’t turn to a person beset by weakness and say “I’d like to help you, but what you’re looking for can only be provided by God.” Maybe the best we can do is to offer “I can feel that you are troubled, and I wish that I could help you. But when I faced my own trials, I found my strength within.” That may sound cold and callous to some, but there may be ways of saying it that express confidence that the same will be true to our friend. Maybe there will even come a moment when they turn, in curiosity, to look within our hearts and minds, and see the love of Christ working within, and so find the courage to ask “Where did you turn to find it?”



    • Thanks for the response. This is more geared toward dealing with people who are sort of on repeat, not just one-time encounters. What I mean is there are situations where a person may need extra support during an extremely challenging time, sometimes that challenging time can go on a long time. But when a person uses another person’s good-will to the degree that there is a sense of demand to it, then it has ventured out of the healthy range of human interaction and into the toxic range. This is why I mention the importance of in situations like that, we may not be able to control other people, but the one thing we can control is our own thoughts and actions. It can be a fine line to walk as far as wanting to help and over-helping. I think the determining factor is when it starts to drain the life out of the person caring and trying to help. Then it may be time to reassess how one is interacting and whether one is properly caring for one’s own soul. This is a topic that so much more can be said about (and I likely will say more in the future). I’ve learned these lessons the hard way.


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